A unicorn in every backyard

Ah yes here we are once again in the middle of the election season. I'm not really here to vent today, but to celebrate and offer 5 ultra modern, ultra spiritual campaign strategies with our political friends. So lets not waste any more time and get on this rollercoaster.


1/5. Free ice cream for all 🍦

Free salary for homemakers? Check. Free international healthcare? Check. Free housing? Abracadabra brother 🪄, the money to fund it all is now free from your pocket.


2/5. The finger that points at everything but myself 👉🏽

That’s right, we all love a good tale about what the other guy did a billion years ago. I offer you a basket of expired kanmathee gossips 🧺 as my master plan for the nation’s future.


3/5. Symphonies of doom 😨

The world is crumbling. The very sky is falling. A ladder made of barb wire is the only way to climb out of it.  👈🏽 You go to jail.  👉🏽 You go to jail. You all go to jail 🪄✨.


4/5. Saving the chosen ones 🕊️

Hold my mic. 🎤 Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Only the supreme leaders, can master all four elements and bring balance to the nation 🤹🏽‍♂️ . Policies & plans? Meh.


5/5. Navigating the utterly obvious 🐌

This year marks a turning point in history. This year we usher in to a new era of basic necessities. Education that educates 👩🏽‍🎓 . Healthcare that healthcares 🏥 . This year we bathe in the spotlight of enlightenment.


There you have it people. 5 highly effective ultra modern, ultra spiritual campaign strategies for this season. Good luck with the votes.

✍️
Maseeh

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